Toxic relationships come in all forms.
From your best friend to close family members… removing yourself from a toxic relationship is not easy. Sometimes we need to take a second look at our life and decide if some people deserve to be there. There is no manual or instruction booklet to help you with what to do next. But it is worthy to pursue your own happiness and fix the internal damage that emotional abuse has caused.
You are allowed to cut toxic people out of your world — even if you have strong history, even if they are family, even if they have done a lot for you over the years. You are not obligated to keep them around if they are causing you pain. You are allowed to leave them in your past.
Family members are the worst to cause toxic relationships. They know you will sit there and endure the pain and take it. You will try to rationalize their behavior and then forgive their actions. Why? Because they are blood. Family doesn’t get a free pass though, they don’t have the right to belittle us and treat us like dirt.
This is confusing because even though they are blood, they don’t have the right to treat you like that. Trying to fix someone that is toxic is really hard. They cannot be fixed. They are dealing with their own internal issues and they are taking it out on you. Sometimes they realize what they are doing and other times they are trying to justify what they are doing to you is acceptable.
We have to remember it’s not our place to fix them. Some people just like to create drama.
You cannot let the guilt get to you.
No matter what this person put you through, no matter how much hatred you hold for them in your heart, a part of you will always love them. You will always wish things turned out differently. But that does not mean you made the wrong decision. It does not mean you should reach out to them again. This may be hard to comprehend. If someone loved you as much as they said they did, they wouldn’t have been so negative to you in the first place. Sometimes you have to make the unfortunate decision and let them go.
I deserve to be treated with love and respect and therefore I must say goodbye.
I get to create my own family, and I have. Prioritizing my children, my husband, and my own emotional well being by walking away from family, although hard at times, has been an awakening and painful journey. Letting go of family is a choice I would make over again and again to heal. I have since let God in my life and have prayed many times over this.
I pray my life and anyone else encountering this situation can find peace and happiness.
