I remember most of my young adult life thinking I would never have kids. NEVER. I grew up an only child, so I was around adults more than kids and babies.
As a teenager, I briefly tried babysitting and truly hated it. I’m not entirely sure if I just had some tiny terror kids, but I decided quickly that babysitting was just not for me. The thought of being pregnant and giving birth not only freaked me out, I felt generally disinterested in the whole parenting experience. I thought it would never be for me.
And then I met the man who would eventually become my husband about a week after I graduated college. A few months into dating and that “never” turned into a maybe. Maybe I could picture having kids with him, but it was a distant, far-off maybe someday idea. Four years into marriage and we had a “probably in another year” plan, but as often happens in life, the plan changed when we found out we were unexpectedly pregnant.
Right after my daughter was born, I remember reading a quote that said: “The moment a child is born, a mother is also born” and I found that so relatable. Everything before her was like a different life – not in a bad way, but it felt like a whole other person existed once I became a mom.
Even if you THINK you know what motherhood will be like, you truly don’t find out until you become one. Whatever your path to motherhood, I promise you it will be everything and nothing that you expect.
Being a mom grows you, tests you, stretches you in ways you never could have realized. It exposes your weaknesses but also the strengths you didn’t know you had.
Yes, there are a lot of instinctual things that sort of just appear once you become a mom, but also so much of it is learning, trial and error and hoping you’re doing it right! I find myself almost daily looking at my toddler as though I’m looking into a tiny mirror of myself – a mirror that reflects so much of my {and maybe a tiny bit of my husband’s} personality back to me.
Motherhood has made me so much more self-aware of not only my good but also not so great quirks, as I see them often bounced back at me from a 25-pound little person. My very Type A personality has needed to find ways to adapt and change to accommodate allowing her to learn and grow without feeling constantly controlled by an overly anxious mama.
I never expected that parenthood would allow me these opportunities to re-examine myself and really grow as a person, even outside of the title of motherhood. There is no sugarcoating the challenges and stresses that motherhood brings, but there’s almost no way to adequately describe and prepare someone for the joys and growth that also come along with it.
There are many things I’m certain I am meant to do in life and I never think of myself as “just a mom” – but my whole life changed and gained new meaning the day I gained the title of Mama.
The day I gave birth was also the day I was reborn as a mother.
