I Shower Every Night, But Not Because I’m Dirty

When my husband and sons are all tucked in bed and fast asleep, my daily home duties are complete, and my work is caught up, I eagerly head to my shower before I call it a night. But it’s not because I’m dirty…

I mean, let’s face it: I AM dirty. I’m covered in drool, dirt, lunch remnants, leftover makeup, four layers of dry shampoo, spit-up and probably other stinky, germy things, but that’s not WHY I shower.

I shower because I start my day before the sun comes up after getting less than a few consecutive hours of sleep and I’m tired. My shower is relaxing.

I shower because after I have spent hours consoling, carrying and cuddling a teething baby, I just want to be on the receiving end of warmth and solitude for a bit. My shower is warm and secluded.

I shower because my thoughts are interrupted 27,000 times a day and when I’m in my shower, it doesn’t interrupt me. I can think. I can pray. I can plan. I can dream. My shower doesn’t ask questions.

I shower because being a work-from-home mother to a toddler and a baby means I don’t get downtime during the day. When I’m in my shower, I can just stand there and do nothing.

I shower because I’ve dealt with a range of emotions from the tiny people depending on me. When I’m in my shower, I can let out my emotions and my shower doesn’t emote back.

I shower because I’ve been teaching and guiding and planning and preparing all day. And while I enjoy it, I also enjoy having ZERO obligations at times. My shower doesn’t depend on me.

I shower because I’m still learning this whole “wife and mother” thing and I wonder if I gave everyone all the “proper” amounts of attention and love throughout the day. My shower reminds me that while I’m getting physically clean, I’m also getting a clean slate for tomorrow.

I shower because while I am busy and challenged by my days, I truly love them, appreciate them and enjoy them {mostly}. And while I’m not looking for pity from my shower {or anyone},  I do OWE it to myself to shower.

I recognize that in order to continue to be a loving and successful wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend and business owner, I must practice self-care. In this stage of my life…having uninterrupted quiet-time in the shower is just that.