Something unthinkable and inconceivable has happened to you. I know you feel like you will never be whole again. Like nothing will ever be the same. How can you go on? Will you ever feel like you’re not broken and hurting again?
And here’s what no one may have thought to tell you: You don’t have to heal right now. You don’t need to put a brave face on it if you don’t want to. Take your time.
Everyone has an idea of how long you should mourn. Everyone has their own thoughts on how you should feel.
They don’t matter. They’re not you, and they aren’t in your shoes. Don’t try to please anyone. Grief is a very private thing. Anyone who says different has an agenda.
So burrow into your safe haven, cling to your family, and settle in for the long haul.
But here is the good news: the sun will shine again. You will think of this time without crying. This will not mean that it means less – it just means that the wound isn’t as fresh. And it may not be tomorrow, or next month, or even next year. Don’t let anyone rush you.
And perhaps most importantly, know that you are not alone. One in four pregnancies ends in a loss. This means that even if you don’t know about it, you are likely surrounded by fellow grievers. When you’re ready, reach out. We are with you.
And someday, when your race is run and your life is complete, I truly and honestly believe that there will be someone waiting for you. That little face will light up and you will be greeted with, “I’ve waited for you!”
